Boxes

There is so much going on in our little world! First, in case you haven't heard, we are moving.... the new house is just a couple of miles down the road, but meets a lot of needs that our current house doesn't and is a foreclosure, so we hope it will be a great investment. We still haven't closed though - we're going on 2 weeks past our original closing date with no real idea when this will actually happen...something that you know is very likely, but is still so disappointing when it happens. We started packing some things over a month ago and some things we've never unpacked at this house, so the boxes are beginning to multiply. I'm a planner and like to plan out exactly where everything is going to go and have everything organized in the boxes. Not to mention, having a plan for wrapping up things in the current house and transitioning to the new one. The Bible teaches about our "well laid plans" and how it's all truly in God's control...well that's so true :) We had visions of cleaning, painting, leisurely moving & organizing, before the official moving day... now we're less than a week and a half from "moving day" and still haven't even closed. Guess we'll be cleaning and moving and unpacking all at once and the painting - well, guess we'll have to take it a room a weekend once we move in. It's interesting, packing up all your "stuff" and realizing how temporary it all is, though. Not just the individual items, but also life...

Most people know about all the challenges in our lives last Summer, and although our lives forever changed, we eventually returned to a more normal state. Although, each month, when I refill prescriptions I have a little reminder, at some point we began living like we had overcome this great obstacle and would never face it again. I have studied and read and know that conditions like Mark's don't just magically go away, but once he fully recovered, I felt like, with a few changes of lifestyle, we could breathe again and hopefully wouldn't face this again for at least 10 years.

Well, some things have come up with his heart in the past few weeks and we don't know that outcome of everything (tests, ect) and obviously what treatment may be required, but it has definitely brought up a world of emotions that are not welcome and all too familiar. Last night, I was thinking about all that's going on in our lives right now and it made me wish that I could just pack up some of my emotions & fears & uncertainties in a box, tape it up and not come back to that box for years...but that is not reality. There's a song that's played a lot right now called "Blessings" by Laura Story and it has totally become my theme song. For anyone who is going through a low place in life or a time when things don't "add up", or maybe you just feel like "life" is trying to take away your joy, you should listen to this song. I don't like feeling out of control and this is most definitely one of those, "totally out of my control" issues. All we can do is pray & wait & trust that God's blessings come in ways we don't understand, through people we never expect & at moments that seem impossible!

Back to life...

So I'm trying to bring my blog back to life! As I've said in the past, I find my self "blogging" weekly, sometimes daily in my head. Anyway, this is a resurrection of this blog :)

Kamdyn Reece joined us just 3 days after my last blog. I knew I wan't feeling like myself the 19th of January and each day that passed let me know that something was up...my water broke January the 21st and almost 18 hours later, our sweet Kamdyn joined us! We are so blessed by her. She is a sweet, sweet baby. So laid back and just doing well in every way. She has rolled over both ways and is doing great with her feedings, playing, sleeping schedule. It's such a beautiful thing to see the love between Trenton & Kamdyn at such a young age and early point in their relationship. I know they will have plenty of times when they don't get along or disagree, but for now, I'm just loving every moment of watching them stare at each other and smile!

This Mother's Day was so special! Mark really made me feel loved and appreciated. It is different being the mom of two now...Mother's Day, that is. Not sure if other moms have experienced this feeling, but it's like you have fully submerged yourself into motherhood! Not that you can't be a great Mom of just one, but there are so many things you have to juggle and love to share once you add your second and it made me enjoy Mother's Day all the more. I have also really been challenged, in my spirit, to strive to be the very best Mom to Trenton & Kamdyn! This is the hardest and very best job in the world and I'm so thankful it's mine!!

I MUST get to bed...it's 1:45am and tomorrow is a big day! First baby arrives at 5:50am....

Any day....

It's official - I can't get off of the couch, or really any chair, without a struggle ;)

I still have a number of things on my, "TO-DO Before Baby Arrives" list, but I'm certainly not marking them off as quickly as I would like. There are several little things that are really slowing me down this time around... difficulties like swelling, numbness, carpal tunnel & a nerve issue in my abdomen and then there's Trenton, but he's my wonderful "time consumer"! A baby is a complete miracle and gift from God, and none of these difficulties will last forever but the precious life at the end will, so it's 100% worth it!!!

We have finally decided on a name and yes we are keeping it a secret like we did with Trenton Luke! It was so hard for us to decide and then 2-3 days after we settled on her name, I came up with two more names that are just perfect with Trenton and KRW. I have no idea why those came so easily, but I guess after debating and discussing so many names it's not that weird. I told Mark we're set for our next two - he just rolled his eyes and said, "yeah, right" ;) We told Trenton what her name will be, but he is not accepting any name other than "Baby Sissy"!!

The doctor said she doesn't think I'll go past my due date (2/3) and we hope she comes 1/27...so that's just a week away. Yay! For the most part I'm a private person, so there won't be any labor news or updates or anything of the sort, just a Surprise, She's Here....and the revealing of her name of course! Next blog will be all about "Baby Sissy" - Unless I become inspired about something, other than a nap! :)

A New Year!

So, normally I'm totally bummed about seeing all the Christmas decorations come down, but this year is different. Getting all the Christmas stuff put away means I can get busy with all the baby stuff that I've been needing to do...organizing, decorating, ect!

We had a really great Christmas! I just kept thinking how blessed we are to have what we have and then we received gifts on top of it all. I'm certainly not a person that compartmentalizes a year, but after the challenges we faced in 2010, it really changed my perspective on so many things. I am so thankful to have my husband, my son and soon to be daughter. Who needs stuff on top of all of that. We spent Christmas with family and it makes the holiday so special.

Trenton really got into Christmas this year...wow, he is sooooo much fun!

Now we are just waiting on our baby girl to join us. Still in search of the perfect name, but we really are close. Hahaha! People keep telling me how early their 2nd baby came and how we really need to choose a name :) it is such a permanent thing and for whatever reason, we have really struggled to find anything that fit. At this point, Trenton won't call her anything other than "Baby Sissy". We try to get him to say names that we're throwing around and he tells us, "that's not her name...it's baby sissy!!" I think he's going to be a protective big brother.

Well, I have quite a long to-do list for myself...things I want to accomplish before baby, so I need to try a check a few more things off... Happy New Year!

December Already??

I'm such a horrible blogger.... I'm blogging in my head almost daily, it's just in getting time to sit down and type it out that I fail. Oh well, life goes on ;)

Life has been so busy...I mean, SO busy! We keep saying that after "this" project or "this" event that life is slowing down, or that nothing is planned....RIGHT! Mark & I have always been busy, always filling up our schedules, even before we met. It's fun and we really enjoy doing things for the church, getting together with friends old & new and just keeping life spontaneous. There is a time or point though that you just have to ask yourself, has being busy taken over our lives? I think the answer for us would be yes...if we're being honest with ourselves.

Ministry life.....is crazy, challenging, unpredictable, time-consuming, joyous, rewarding, frustrating, misunderstood, unconventional and wonderful! The thing to remember is that God established family before he established the church and unfortunately this "life" often blurs the lines of work/recreation, work/busyness, work/friendship & even work/family. This probably doesn't make much sense to anyone that is not or has not been in ministry work. I wouldn't change our calling because I know that God knows what's best! I do however want to be aware when we let our job or calling consume us in an unhealthy way.

As I look ahead to our soon changing family, I feel so compelled to re-prioritize our life as the Whitakers. Ministry is great-it's what we're called to; traveling is great-it's one of the things we really love; extended family is great-they are our history and heritage, supporting & loving; friendship is great-helps keep us balanced and gives us perspective...outside of growing in Christ and listening and obeying what God specifically asks of us, none of these should take away from our family though, the soon to be 4 of us!

I've never been big on "New Years Resolutions". If something is out of order in my life, why wait, let's deal with it now, so this is my challenge to myself - for my husband and children. Keep life in perspective. Deal with issues in grace and love and when they are current, don't try to wait for the perfect moment. Don't rationalize and make reasons for why it's okay to take this or that on as long as my family is there...no that's not giving them my best. Actually, it's often only giving them my left-overs and when life gets so hectic, it almost always means I'm giving God my very last left-overs. Priorities are so hard to get right, but so easy to keep life going smoothly when they are where they need to be!

If I follow my current trend..... ;) I may not blog again until after Christmas.

If that's is true then I want to say this now, my hope for all my family & friends is that Christmas will be a celebration of the life God has given you, the people God has placed in your life and the hope and future that only He can bring! Merry Christmas!!

Busy times....

The last couple of weeks have been overwhelmingly busy! Last weekend, I, with

A LOT of great, help, finished a remodel of the children's ministry area at the church. 10-10-10 was the kick-off of Kidz Blitz as well as a big day for the church....a push to invite friends then a cook-out after church.... There was the church yard sale the day before and then Sunday evening our Couples Small Group. A crazy weekend for sure!!

The work paid off, but I thought I wouldn't make it. This week I've been soooooo tired. Hahaha! I read that once you lose sleep you can't "catch up", there's no such thing, that lost sleep is just lost! So how is it that exhaustion can catch up to you but you can't catch-up on sleep to compensate? ;)

In my busyness, I didn't take as long for my quiet times and my prayers were definitely "on-the-go" (more than usual). So this morning, since the house has been so quiet, I've spent some time catching up and just reflecting. It's been so good and a great way to overcome the yucky dream I woke up from this morning. I was reading about Cain and Abel and Gen. 4:7 says "sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it." I thought about me getting "too busy" to have quiet time and that's just not smart! Imagine how different we would live if we lived with this verse always on our minds?! I know I would think & act differently in so many situations. I don't believe this verse is an attempt to make us fearful...it's like the center square on a bingo game...just something to help us win in life, if we choose to use it.

I love how you can read something so many times and then suddenly, God can bring something new out and help you see again for the first time! Super cool - and that's what happened here for me today!

I'm trying to slow down a little, but the Fall Festival is less than 2 weeks away...I can't wait for my Mom to come for a visit! She is always such a help, especially in crazy busy times like this. Hug your Momma today...wish I could hug mine!

Quiet...

The house is so quiet. It is nice to get that break during the middle of the day...it's funny how, a quiet house during nap time is fine with me, but a house that's quiet because my baby isn't here or there are no little ones around, just makes me sad! :) Anyway, a quiet house, always makes me start thinking and replaying things that have been going on. This afternoon, I've been thinking about a stack of medical bills sitting on my table. I was thinking about them and all the stress and emotions tied to them, which made me think - I should blog! Then I thought, "why do I blog?" My answer to myself is, it helps me clear my head. Somedays are filled with conversations with people mostly 2 years old and under ;) and so it helps me feel like I've almost had a conversation with an adult...hahaha! Blogging also helps me see through my chaos and trials...see God, very present in my situations.

So, I'm still trying to set up payment plans and work out insurance issues on multiple bills and this morning I really had a melt-down over it all. Everyone says, oh as long as you pay them something you can't be punished or pursued or whatever. So, maybe I'm being pushed around or maybe because times have changed and the economical situation freaks everyone out the rules have changed....either way, I really let it get to me earlier! I called one office and she was very forward, and said, "So are you going to do $100 a month or more??" Really, well, if I only had to pay that one office off, sure, but I have 8 or 10 more that I need to make arrangements with, so no, I can't do $100 or more... I felt like I should be the one being a little more forward on the next call, so I didn't wait to be asked, I just offered, $50 a month (really, more than I wanted to offer, but I guess I was feeling prideful and ashamed to say $20 or $25 a month). He informs me that, $50 a month isn't an option. Uhhhh, what?! Then, in a very polite way, he explains that they are not allowed to take a bill out through a payment plan for longer than 12 months and he is supposed to push for it to be payed off in 4 months (Not likely, brother! :). Basically, they will just send you to collections immediately if you don't commit to an amount that will pay it off in the required time AND if you commit, but then don't pay that amount, off you go still...OH DEAR! As I hung up, I just laid my head on the kitchen table - feeling sorry for myself and overwhelmed too...then I felt two sweet little hands touch my leg, heard little feet walking around and then a little voice say, Mommy, what ya doin?

The bills are still sitting there, but I had a quick reality check that the most important things are not laying on the table, but walking around, playing and wanting to be hugged and loved on! I know that the doctors that took care of Trenton and Mark are worthy of getting paid for the work they did. I don't discount that at all, but the way the situation was handled this morning made me think about, grace. Who in my life am I not giving the grace they deserve? God continually gives it to me even though I don't deserve it! Am I getting so caught up in things revolving around my life that I don't even see others reality? I hope that I can truly see people more like Christ does...see them completely and be open to working with them, even when it doesn't serve me or maybe even makes life a little inconvenient for me at the time.

Nothing Jesus did was through the mindset of how does this serve me, but always, how can I serve others!! I want to be more like that!!