The Secret Place

I'm not always an open book...okay, I'm often not an open book. My husband and I are total opposites in that area. As with most everything in life, balance is what is needed and in my attempt to be more balanced, I'm being more transparent today. 

Life can be hard. Especially when the hard, goes on and on...You know we often go through a "hard time" but as we glance back, we see that time but can see before that time and remember that it was really such a small part of our life - just a moment in time. But, when you look back over the past months, even years and you see mostly hard times, life becomes more challenging. Trust me, I don't believe in living in the past, or even focusing on the past, but the past can, does & should shape us; for the good. The only way it can shape us for the good, is if we pull the good from it,  yet it will shape up for the bad if we focus on the wrong parts or just focus too much on the past altogether. So for me, this looking back is really like glancing in the rearview mirror.  I'm a mirror checker, though y'all!  I'm always checking my side & rear view mirrors when I'm driving and I live my life that way too. I want to be aware of my surroundings so I can learn from them, grow from them and be thankful for the things God spares me from & brings me through!

So I've been doing a lot of assessing of my life lately. Our family has been facing some challenging situations - really since the beginning of 2016. So not only have I been assessing these situations, but also, my heart, my relationship with God my Father, my response to Him & to these situations. I've discovered something about myself that is not what I hoped would be, yet provides opportunity for change and growth. 

You see, I have BIG FAITH. I have some of the best roles models. Men and women that have built an amazingly strong, Godly, faith-filled heritage for me to walk in. So when I look at the challenges that my family has been walking through, my faith is strong. It doesn't waiver. Do I have moments where I ask God, why? Yep! Do I have moments where I ask Him for just a little understanding? You bet! Do I have moments where I plead with Him for a brief reprieve from these things that feel so heavy? Absolutely! But through it all, I am confident that He knows the "why", that His ways are higher so it may not be humanly possible for me to understand and that He will bring reprieve, although He may bring it in a different way than I expect, because He knows what's best. 

Here's what I've got to change...the secret place. The place I run to when life gets overwhelming. When the waves are crashing over me so fast, that I fall again, before I ever make it to fully standing...when the quarters of the game are without a halftime or even a water break. The secret place is not a place to run to initially, then just stand out in the rain hoping that the prayers I prayed back "there" will sustain me in the downpour. The secret place is always there. It's the break my heart so desperately desires, even if for just a moment. It's the rest my mind needs when I've taken on more than I should. It's the answer to every question I may ask of God. It's the peace, the peace that most certainly passes my limited, understanding. It's the secret place, just me & my Heavenly Father. It's more than quiet time. It's more than my daily scripture or devotion reading. It's deep. It's refreshing. And it's not a place that I should visit only at the onset of a challenge. 

It is quite possible that in my walk with Christ, I have not fully-developed this practice yet, but for me, I have not been able to make it to the secret place each day. In fact, with the very best intentions & even a strong desire, I set my heart and mind to get there last night and the next thing I knew, I woke up and it was 3am!  But as I make the time to go there, more and more frequently, the path becomes clearer. When you walk through an untouched field for the first time, you path quickly becomes unrecognizable, but as you commit to walk that path more and more, the weeds and grasses in that path begin to lay down to your footsteps and you can reach the secret place with more ease & confidence. 

I pray that if you need answers, healing, hope or faith restored, that you'll make a path to the secret place with God, and go there often. I'll be there too!

Hit the Pause!

My kids love the pause button on the remote! I think it's their favorite -

I'll hear, "Where's the remote??" . . . and the next thing out of their mouth is, I wanna get a snack, or I need to go to the bathroom, or I wanna go get a toy... honestly, it dries me crazy. I always feel a hint of the entitlement mentality that is eroding our society, but that's another topic for another day. ;) It did lead me down a thought process that so many moms & dads need to put into practice though, me being the first to jump in that line!

How often do you pause to asses why your son or daughter is misbehaving? How often do you pause to ask God for guidance in disciplining your little ones? How often do you pause to ask yourself if this battle, be it with your kids, your spouse or co-workers, is really worth it? I have to insert a little disclaimer here...I'm not a huge "pick your battles" kind of Momma - if it is a rule in our house, you gotta follow it! If I've given my child direction about what to wear or what to eat or how to handle something, I'm not one to just "pick the battle" and allow them to do whatever they please if the battle seems to big or might make us late or whatever. (We do work towards compromise though, if the situation allows.) So what I'm really referring to, in bringing up battles, is this, am I simply fighting the problem or the actual source of the problem?

This past Sunday, we taught on fighting the good fight (1 Tim. 6:12). Learning to choose the "good fight" takes work and moments of pause. The Holy Spirit is always at work in my life, but it's often in a moment of pause that I truly receive the clarity I need from His guidance. Often, I, and maybe you, begin a moment of pause but as soon as we feel guidance is being given, we jump into action and use it at our discretion instead of in the timing and way He intended. In reality, there is the guidance, hope, peace or word that we need being given, but immediately following is the wisdom to walk it out! IF, we take the time to hear it. 

This past Sunday we had a situation where we thought we "lost" a child during children's church. I take this very seriously, and have conveyed to volunteers to seriousness of their responsibility to make sure our kiddos are safe. In a moment {void of pause} a panicked search party formed and a bit of chaos ensued. Reality was, the child left church with his family and was on his way home for a relaxing Sunday afternoon, while folks frantically searched for someone that wasn't even lost. A lot of lessons were learned and a huge moment of pause was taken to reflect on what we should have done differently. I'm certain though, that we do this in our personal lives far more than we want to admit. We miss times of rest, times of peace, times of guidance, times of learning, times of growth because we don't take time to pause. 

When something happens in my house that turns things upside down (anger, a bad attitude or wrong decision, running late, etc) and we then realize things need to change, we say, "let's press the reset button".  We're adding another button to our family remote...PAUSE!

What do you think, do you need to begin intentionally take moments of pause? Join us in taking time to "press the pause button" in our lives!

This is one of my favorite places to "pause"!  Orange Beach, AL

Time to revive the blog!  Today has been a whirlwind of a day; actually it's been a whirlwind week. My little loves started school today and the only one that cried was me. I'd call that a success for sure. "T" began 3rd grade and "K" began kindergarten...WHAT? Time for baby #3 - if I can just get the husband on board... ;)

I've been reading a book that is so apropos for this moment in time, it is titled, "Praying Circles Around Your Children" by Mark Batterson. If you've ever read any of his books, you know how impactful they can be and this one is no exception to that. I keep going back to the very first few paragraphs in the book where he mentions the good and the bad about parenting & prayer for our children. The bad news, as we all have experienced, is that we make a lot of mistakes. If you're like me, it's easy to allow those mistakes to consume your mind, to fill you with guilt, to cause you to walk in shame or to promote parenting that never follows through. If you fall into any of those categories, then we have to change our mindset, because as Batterson puts it, the good is that "our worst mistakes double as our greatest opportunities"!

Did that grip your heart like it did mine? If we're wrapped up in the mistake we've made, we miss the greatest opportunity for modeling behaviors we want to see in our children - repentance, sorrow, forgiveness, kindness, humility... Being "human" in front of our kiddos also opens up moments for deep, meaningful connections. It takes choosing to look past the mistake and see that we made a mistake, but we aren't mistakes. That isn't always easy, but making that choice positions us to grow in Christ, as parents & in relationship with our Littles. 

Another huge opportunity for connection is actually praying your prayers for your children, with them. Letting them hear your heart for them and hear how you call their name to our Father, leaves an imprint other life that doesn't quickly fade. Speaking of prayer, I have to share some great news that we received today. My little guy has been begging to play football for years now and we thought the time had finally come; until, the sports physical stopped us. After some testing on his heart, we received the call late this afternoon with great results, and he has been cleared to play! The other beautiful part of this is that although it revealed some ongoing issues, we can now deal with them medically, but also speak directly to God about them. This is amazing news and we are so thankful for the many friends and family that called his name out to our Father!

If you aren't praying daily for and with your children, make it a point to start.  I fully agree with Batterson that "Spiritual disciplines take sheer determination". Determine that you are going to take your prayer life up to a higher place!

Five Years...

The Past Five Years

Change has been the theme!

What's Happening

The past few days have been a whirlwind.  

Last Saturday, we went to Tuscaloosa for the Alabama Homecoming game against Georgia St 

(the tickets were one of Mark's Father's Day gifts)...and we WON!! 

It was the first game we've attended {but won't be the last!} and we had soooooo much fun!    It was a long day though. We left home at 5:30a, and didn't get home until 9:30p.  

The heat was intense, 90+ degrees, & we walked over 5 miles.  

The kids, although they didn't walk it all, did so well with all the walking & heat!

Last week, we put our house on the market.  

We put a 'for sale by owner' sign up over a month ago, but hadn't really had any interest, so we listed it with a friend, not sure how quickly we'd get people looking, much less an offer. 

While we were at the game, a family looked at the house AND placed an offer.  

This is the second house we've sold but the first time we've sold through an agent, so we had lots of questions about what's next, is this for real, etc. It was such an unexpected blessing that Mark & I were brought to tears right there in the stadium.  We love our house & don't really want to move, but the weight of our finances caused us to evaluate some things & made us look at all our options. We did not realize the equity in our house and know this is a gift from God. 

Sundays are always CRAZY days!  This past one was no exception.  

Rehersal, setting up for Children's Church, service, lunch with people from church....

This week kicked off our first, FALL BREAK!  T has been so excited to be out of school.  

We, Dad & Mom, have been excited too, but unfortunately, work had to continue for us.  

We did set Monday aside though, to spend the day together and just have fun.  

We went to the Atlanta Children's Museum, Centennial Park & Starbucks for a sugar-free hot chocolate, *Trenton's request!  (There are pictures below)   

Sunday & Monday we spent a lot of time driving around as well, searching for a house to rent, because we have to be out of ours by the end of the month.  It's so funny this has all happened right at the five year mark of moving to Georgia.  It's fitting, because this move is really different for us.  It's a big change and it's bringing about an even bigger change.  

The Past

The past 5 years have been all about change.  When we moved here, we had a yorkie and a 10 week old baby.  We had been married a little over 2 years and had been very healthy during that time - only going to the dr once or twice over those two years (except for prenatal visits).  

We had both been in ministry for a number of years, but hadn't really had any difficult or challenging situations.  Our life was good and had been fairly easy up until that point.  

We've experienced a lot of physical problems over the past 5 years.  Mark's unknown heart disease is one of the major factors - when it showed up, it really showed up.  Finding out we were expecting baby #2 while he was recovering from heart surgery & a heart attack was not easy.  Both of our children have struggled with digestive problems that no one has been able to diagnose & recently Sissy's seizure-like episodes have really been a mystery & again brought us to our knees over her health as well as being able to afford testing, etc.  

There have been plenty of church challenges as well - financial, relational, locational.

As well as something I prayed we'd never experience, a church split...they are heartbreaking.

We've also had financial strain that our medical expenses have pushed to the limit. 

BUT, through a lot of stress, heart ache, uncertainty, worry & pain, we've seen God do some really special things.  Many of those blessing have been tangible, but there have been many that haven't... things like great relationships He's blessed us with, encouragement in our darkest places, and certainly emotional & spiritual growth. 

The Change

Over the past 5 years, we've grown & changed so much.  

God has used even the really hard stuff to mold us & prepare us for things only He knows are ahead of us.  Some of those things have already happened & some may still be ahead.  

Most importantly, God has been far more faithful to us than we have deserved.  

We don't know what the next 5 years holds, or really even what the next 5 weeks holds, but we are confident in this, God will never be farther from us than we allow Him to be, because the Bible says that as we get closer to Him, He comes closer to us.  We have also experienced the truth in the verse that says, He is near the brokenhearted!  

He won't let us down, even though we let Him down, usually, daily.  

We believe that we are about to begin a new season of our lives... one big piece of that puzzle is going to be paying off {hopefully} all of our debt!  We are overwhelmed beyond words at the blessing this house has been...we now see that God led us here, when we weren't even looking, just to bless us, October 2013, and bring us out of debt...

something we've been working towards for some time now.  

Easy is great!  

I love it actually, but it doesn't bring about the growth & trust 

in the One who holds tomorrow, that change & uncertainty usually bring.  

Change is still certain in our future.  

But whatever comes, we know that walking with the One who created this world 

will assure us of a few things - 

we are loved, 

we can trust Him, 

no challenge on earth will last forever,

 we are winners in the end.

Your Life

If you have challenges that rocked your world, know that you really aren't alone.  

There is someone that has been through what you're going through. 

But an even greater assurance is this, God will stay by your side even if no one else knows the struggles going on in your life, even when you don't look to Him until you've looked everywhere else, even when you've exhausted yourself in trying to find the answer, make it work or fix it all, Jesus will be right there, ready & willing to wrap you in His arms 

& carry you through the places where you can't carry yourself.  

. 

Centennial Park...the weather was beautiful!

 Kamdyn @ the Atlanta Children's Museum

 Trenton @ the Atlanta Children's Museum

 Our family...we are so blessed!

My Love!

Moving...

Well, our church has officially moved out of our old location!  It was a week of complete exhaustion!! ...full of lots of boxes, trash, planning, coordinating, frustration, joy, excitement and energy drinks! ;)

Leaving the parking lot yesterday was surreal.  Definitely something I've prayed about and for, for a long, long time.  We are overjoyed to be debt free!  God's way of working things out always exceeds what you dreamed up or how you thought things would best work!  I am honored to be a part of this church, this team and this season of outreach and ministry for McDonough.  

I have been blessed to be a part of two church plants and this, in a lot of ways feels like planting a church.  The great thing about it is, we already have 200 people planting with us!! This move has been much harder for some than others...and rightfully so.  But I read a question yesterday and it really made me think - here's the question - "Is it possible to get so wrapped up in our faith, that the concepts of faith become more important than our actual faith?"  The answer is yes!  That made me think about the church... Is is possible to get so wrapped up in the concept of church, that "doing church" {i.e. dinners, socials, fundraisers, plaques on the wall, classes that we've always had, doing things the way we've always done them, & even the relationships we build with people} becomes more important than true church?  I believe that the answer is, YES!  What is church?  It is us.  It is a group of people who have come together for 1 purpose and that's Jesus.  We are the church, whether we meet in a cathedral or a small, rented store-front; a multi-million dollar building or underground.  Who we are not determined by where we meet or what our facility looks like - although I believe that God blesses when you prepare for people and do it with excellence - it is determined by who we believe God is, how we allow Him to shape us, as well as whatever He calls us to do. 

I am praying and ask you to say a prayer with me that our church as well as all Christians, will begin walking out our faith and not just living with "faith" around us.  Let's also realize that we are the church...not the building and not just the group of people that meet with me each week, but all people that have put their trust in God and live for Him.  I love how two different churches are drawing close to each other; bonds are being made & faith being strengthened as we receive God's awesome blessings!  My heart is full when I think about all that God is going to do through Tabernacle of Praise & The Landing Church @ McDonough as we both move forward!!

Blessings ~ W

What a load?!

I rarely share this type of thing in a social media type setting, but the Bible says, we have not because we ask not.  I know, that is speaking of what we are asking God for, but part of the reason God makes believers a "family" is so that we can 'share the load'...
I'm asking you to help us share our load.  

We, (Mark, Trenton, Kamdyn & myself) need your prayers.  We are humbled by the position of ministry God has led us into.  We, by no means, sought it out.  We can look back at situations over the past 4-5 years and see things that we took for surface value, that were actually key moments of God's preparation for this season of our lives.  We are in awe at how God has orchestrated every detail over the past year, and our church's upcoming move is no exception!  Please understand, our hope, confidence and trust is in God and Him alone and we lean heavily on Phil. 4:13 ("I can do all things...") but, we are not exempt to human weakness and we are definitely feeling the strain of the enormity of this move.  

When there just aren't enough hours in each day or energy in our bodies, it's easy to get cross or short.  It's easy to lose focus, to feel like you're drowning, to begin looking only at yourself and taking pity.  Life doesn't go on hold because of one, single situation in your life...tonight, after working at the church for most of the afternoon, I got home to 4 loads of laundry that need to be folded and 5-6 more that need to be washed.  My exhausted Kamdyn cried for an hour trying to drift off to sleep and Trenton had a tummy ache that was keeping him up.  I have several documents to create before church, sippy cups & snacks to pack, dinner to prepare for tomorrow since we'll be working at the church, and clothes to lay out.....my list goes on, but my heart says just call on God.  
In doing that, I was impressed to ask for a few people to be like Aaron was for Moses - for Mark & me.  Some jobs Aaron worked at together, with Moses, and other times he just held up Moses' hands.  We usually look at Moses & what he did, because He was the leader, but both jobs were necessary. Both had to be done.  Both we're needed to accomplish God's plan. 

We really are just at the beginning of this move process, and if we're being honest, we're already a little weary going in to these next two weeks.  Please, say a prayer that we stay focused on the big picture and that God speak to some Aarons to work alongside us, while others keep us lifted up in prayer.  Also, please pray for Trenton & Kamdyn, they are such a blessing and are amazingly flexible with our crazy schedule.  They don't feel the weight of it all, but they experience the results of the weight and for that I ask God give them a special blessing, understanding & endurance!  The great thing about it all, that it is just for a season and that this challenge has an end.  What's even better, is that through this, God is doing a great work in our lives & in our church!!



As I thought about all of this, I thought about trucks with the "Wide Load" sign.  It's easy to see when there is a wide load, even without the sign, but there are no signs and often no clues to the real weight of a truck's load.  I think the same is true for our lives.  It's easy to see when there's a big job or a big situation in a person's life, but not often known how heavy a load they are carrying.  The only way to see that, is through the Holy Spirit, opening your eyes to it.  I'm praying that my eyes be open and my heart be sensitive to those heavy loads being carried, by those around me!  Blessings ~

1000 Days

1000 days ago, I was facing the most frightening day of my life!  My love was heading into surgery...major surgery!  The man, who had been to the doctor once in the almost 4 years we had been married (for a kidney stone), was headed into bypass surgery for his heart.  It was a day full of anticipation! Dread, fear & anxiety all kept welling up inside of me...but there was also assurance, hope & even moments of complete peace.  

As I think back on that day, I thank God for it!  Without that day, my life would be drastically different now...my husband's life was saved.  Our lives together were forever changed, but we know that God has been with us completely!  There are challenges that we will forever face now, but there is also a confidence in our tomorrows that we gained through that experience.  I thank God for guiding the doctors, for the support of friends & family during that time - there are people I had never met that touched my heart so deeply with their prayers & words of encouragement, but most of all I thank God for His constant presence with me when I felt I was facing an impossible situation! 

The 1000 days that have passed have taken us through some wonderful moments and some others that we would have rather not traveled through, but I'm reminded of the verse in Psalm 90:4 - "For you, a thousand years are as a passing days as brief as a few night hours."  God holds everyday.  Nothing slips by Him.  Each day may seem huge to us, but God sees it as a brief moment of the great plans He has for each of us.  He never leaves us to face, even a moment, alone.  His will is perfect & His plans prosper those who put their lives fully in His care.  His love is like no other. He is sovereign! 

In the past 1000 days we have...
Dealt with a serious medication reaction just a week after Mark got out of the hospital; welcomed a lovely little bundle, named KAMDYN; Mark dealt with pleurisy, which mimicked previous heart issues, giving us a scare; bought a foreclosed house, a HUGE blessing; discovered Mark has Bundle Branch Blockage; sent Mark off on his 1st missions trip since we've been married; begun a wonderful tradition with our family - our presents at Christmas are in the form of time away with our children & parents - PRICELESS; had our first "real" injury to Trenton - he's now proud of his scar ;); saw Mark go into surgery again, this time just a hernia repair & had great results; gone through the most challenging year of ministry, but also the year that we have felt the most love & blessings from our Pastor & congregation; watched our brilliant Trenton go from a baby to a boy, now getting ready to begin kindergarten, 
my list could go on & on....

This has been a time of crazy changes in our lives, but they all, through the work of God in our lives, have been turned to good & helped shape us into who we are today.  The next 1000 days are yet to be walked out, but I've learned to lean more on God & what He has today...we aren't promised tomorrow, but if it comes, let God be your guide through whatever challenges come because that's when you'll see Him most, sense Him closest to you & experience blessings you never thought you'd see!  They may not always come immediately, but they will come!