Monday, June 6, 2011


I wasn't able to blog about it over the weekend, but the past 2 days were filled with bittersweet emotions. Saturday, June 4th was one year since Mark's surgery. I am so blessed to have him by my side and I am so thankful that God chose him for me! Dealing with sudden health issues opens your eyes to how fleeting life on earth really is and how much can change in such a seemingly routine day.

The past week and a half we have been moving and it's easy for me to get into a mode where I want to get it all done and forget everything else that's going on in life at the moment, but reflections over the past weekend reminded me that although the stuff needs to get done, it can't be at the expense of missing a snuggle with my babies, a heartfelt conversation with my husband or just a moment of allowing God's peace to refill me.

Reflections can cause you to run away or make a change. I am choosing to make changes. If you don't like what you see in the mirror, but choose not to look, you've accomplished nothing, but if you decide to evaluate what's there, you can create a plan to change. For me it's the same with reflections about life...if I choose to ignore and not deal with reflections or I just focus on them without looking into them to see what God wants to do through them, then I live a life of fear, shame and even regret. Dealing with reflections and revisiting emotionally hard times allows God to make something beautiful through struggles, and free our hearts of pain, sadness, guilt or hardness!

Summer has begun, it's a new season and as we've made some changes in our life, my goal is to live more and more proactively instead of reactively. The last 2 1/2 years I fell into a rut of just being reactive - this can definitely give you a "victim" mentality and that's one that completely turns me off. One that I fear, I have emulated during this time period, and it's time to get back to being proactive. To taking authority over some things in my life....with God's help I can!

Didn't Know How to LOVE

What a downer title, I KNOW...  Especially 2 flippin' days before Valentine's Day, right?   I am completely undone tonight thou...